This isn’t happening in a vacuum. Dating overall is collapsing. A record 25% of 40-year-olds have never married, up from 20% in 2010. More men than women hit that milestone unmarried. Right now, 63% of men under 30 are single compared to just 34% of women the same age. The math doesn’t add up because women are either dating older men, sharing partners, or sitting out entirely.
The dating gap is stark: 63% of young men are single versus only 34% of women. Someone isn’t doing the math.
College-educated women hold the pickiest standards, and they can afford to. They marry at far higher rates than their noncollege peers, who face what researchers politely call “a deficit of marriageable men.” Translation: fewer options means more compromise. Noncollege women settle. College-educated women don’t have to. Those with bachelor’s degrees or higher face an 18% never-married rate at 40, compared to 33% for those without four-year degrees.
Meanwhile, 40% of college-educated young men report zero hookups or dating during their undergraduate years. Over 60% of young men are currently single, and sexual intimacy sits at a 30-year low. Despite this, men still pursue relationships more aggressively than women—50% of single men seek romance versus only 35% of single women.
Here’s where it gets uncomfortable: 41% of single women seeking relationships want only committed partnerships, compared to 25% of men. Women have tightened their criteria while men have lowered theirs. The share of single men seeking relationships dropped from 61% in 2019 to 50% in 2022. Few young singles now see marriage as essential for a full, rewarding life.
Women increasingly view staying single as attractive, especially post-middle age. Financial independence lets them prioritize careers and personal happiness over traditional family structures. By 2030, projections suggest 45% of women aged 25-44 will be single and childless.
The controversial reality? Women aren’t just rejecting men with unemployment or bad politics. They’re rejecting complexity itself—preferring blank slates to men carrying relationship scars, ex-drama, or emotional histories that require work. This trend aligns with women placing greater value on shared values and mutual compatibility when choosing long-term partners.
